


Let's go home

by shewritesrandomscribbles



Category: A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: ASoIaF, Jonerys, Targaryen Restoration, jonerysendgame
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-09
Updated: 2019-09-09
Packaged: 2020-10-12 23:27:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,979
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20572685
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shewritesrandomscribbles/pseuds/shewritesrandomscribbles
Summary: Old stories say one King in the North lost his mind. Did he?





	Let's go home

“But mother, aren’t those just myths and legends?” A boy, 10 years of age ask his mother as she throws in piles of wood in the fireplace.

Through the window, he stared at the old abandoned castle looming over their small hut. Castle Black, they used to call it. It has been deserted for a century; no one dare enter it as stories of an old man haunting the castle plague the North for years now. A man by many names and titles—King in the North, Lord Commander, a bastard, a half Targaryen. Some even called him the mad man—a man who lost his love, and his life thereafter.

His mother often warns them to stay out of that castle. She would tell them unspeakable horrors have happened there. Old women sit by the fireplace telling the story of the dragon and the wolf over and over again.

“He used to roam the castle”, his mother spoke. “I told you the story of the man who lived there, didn’t I?” 

For countless times, he thought. He sat by the fireplace, reaching for the heat. She continues, “Stories about the brothers of the Night’s Watch? That was the castle they stayed in.”

“The 998th Lord Commander, you mean?” He answered, knowing where this conversation is heading. If he is lucky, his sisters will be too busy knitting upstairs or playing with the wooden swords to even notice their mother repeating this story – for what it feels like the hundredth time now.

“Aye, my boy, he was the best of them all, they said.” 

”He wields a Valyrian sword called Longclaw. He won battles after battles. He even came back from the dead”, his sister chimed in, swaying the wooden swords in the air until finally dropping them at his feet. Great, here we go again.

“The dead?” He snorted. “You still believe people can come back from the dead?” It was impossible. As impossible as the stories about White Walkers and Night King his mother also so often tells.

“Will you shut it? The man who lived at castle black and his lover, Old nan said they both did”, his sister came to join, again, much to his disappointment. She loves mother’s stories. She loves make-believes—magic, dire wolves, dragons. “Please mother, tell us again about the woman, the one with dragons and silver hair, the one with the amethyst eyes”, he told his mother while clasping his hands together as if to plead, just to tease his sisters. 

He chuckled and his sisters ignored him, looking back at their mother.  
“Was she really the most beautiful woman to ever live?” His other sister chimed in. Both sisters love this story—of the Targaryen woman and the Lord Commander.  
Not this again, he thinks. He still cannot understand why his mother insists on him being here. Though he love the stories of the Lord Commander’s battles, how he has gain power and love here in the North. How he rose from being a bastard to a King. He came to assume his sisters were in awe of the silver-haired woman for the same reason he deeply admires the Lord Commander. The dragon queen –as they called her—is as admirable as the King in the North. She birthed three dragons, became a Khaleesi, Queen of the Meeren, and the Seven Kingdoms. She freed slaves and they chose her to lead them, the Breaker of Chains, they called her.

“But the Lord Commander killed her, why is that, mother?” his sister asked, breaking his chain of thoughts. 

“What happened to him? Is it true he haunts the castle?” his other sister asked.  
He does not believe in ghosts or magic, unlike his sisters. 

“The dragon queen was indeed the most beautiful woman to have ever lived. She loved him and he loved her. But the world was unkind and politics governed the realms, war came first. Glory and power comes at the expense of love and affection.” She shook her head. 

“What a terrible time to have lived in. What a terrible time to have found love, indeed. The Lord Commander believed that the only way he can save the realm is by betraying her, by piercing a knife through her heart.” 

His sisters gasped in horror, as if they were hearing of it the first time.  
“I still believe he could’ve talked to her. If only he had been there for her, she wouldn’t have turned that way.” The seven-year old girl said, almost weeping.

The mother nodded, her eyes melancholic, “Now we’ll never know.” 

She paused a bit before continuing with the tale. 

“She was as beautiful as she was fierce. She tamed dragons and rode them into battles, only to emerge victorious. Without her dragons and her armies, we would not be standing here now. She helped defend the living, she helped save the North.”  
He thought of the cold North looking down on someone who just saved their home. Why did they not have the decency to show gratitude? His mother was right, without her, they won’t be able to defeat the White Walkers. He shook his head, wanting to deny that deep down he believes the legends, some of it, at least. While he may have his reservations or just the mere enjoyment of teasing his sisters, he believes. He believes enough, not that he will let his sisters learn of it, of course.

“She can walk on fires and remain unharmed—that’s why they used to call her The Unburnt. They said she had no weakness.”

“And is that true?” his sister wonders.

Mother turned her face to his sister, a sad smile on her face. “The truth is, she only has one – him”.

His sisters leaned in closer to their mother as if urging her to continue. She has told and retold this story again and again but not the events following the burning of King’s Landing. This is a first, he thought; finding himself interested on how this continuation of the story will unfold.

“I have told you about your great great grandfathers, the ones who fought and fell during the battle of King’s Landing. They have followed the King in the North and some came home to tell the tales. Years after the horrible fate of King’s Landing, he stayed here, in that very castle”.

Three siblings turned their heads at the direction their mother was looking at. It was an eerie sight, but one of an odd beauty as well. It’s a wonder how old stones and filthy rags can house so much history.

“For the years after her death, the castle walls would echo with his screams and cries during the night. Each night he would dream of her, the terror, loss, regret; the pain growing each time. Sometimes, he would wake up in the middle of the night and see her standing at his door, the dagger stuck in her chest, and he would cry and scream louder. He would sob his apologies, beg her to kill him.” 

She closed her eyes, swallowing a lump in her throat. The children did the same. 

“At the third anniversary of her death, the Lord Commander drank through the night as he always did after that terrible day, but that night, he lost grasp of reality. Or so they said.”

”Why? What happened to him?”

”Did he see her again? Old Nan used to say she came back from the dead, did she really?” His sister eagerly asked.

His mother paused, most likely thinking of ways to tell the rest of the story without crushing the girls’ hopes for the fallen dragon queen.

“No one knew. People started talking; spreading rumors that the Lord Commander has lost his mind and would often speak to himself inside his chambers. They would hear him calling out to her, saying her name, as if she was standing right before him. No one dared asked him about it; the man had enough cruelty in his life.” 

“She was a ghost, then? She came back to haunt him for betraying her.” The boy was surprised at his own curiosity.

A triumphant smile formed on his mother’s lips, seeing him engage himself in the story. ”Some say she’s a ghost, or a hallucination — the Lord Commander’s own guilt coming to haunt him in the form of the woman he loved and killed. Some say she’s real, that she came back to life and visits him every year since the third anniversary of her death”.

It was time for queries from her sisters. “So she came and went as she pleases? Did he never ask her to stay after all that time”?

“He did, my darling, every time she visits, he would beg her to stay with him. But she would tell him that the North isn’t her home, that she can never find peace here. So then he would beg her to take him to wherever she was going; to let him stay where she was”.

He glanced at his sisters, tears threatening to fall from both their gray eyes.  
“Did she, mother? Did she stay? Did she take him with her?” 

“No. Not on the 5th time he had asked her.” 

“She hasn’t forgiven her yet, is that it, mother?”

“He murdered her; of course she will not forgive him.” The boy answered for his mother.

“While she loved him much so, she still couldn’t trust him fully. And so, it went on. Sometimes she would visit her for two moons in a year, sometimes, she won’t. And every time she won’t, he would stare at the fire for hours and wonder where she is. He would stare at the dying ember for days trying to summon her back to him.”  
“He missed her so.” His sister realized.

“He did, every day since she lay lifeless on his arms. Not once in her visits did he forget to ask her to take him with her. Mother further clarifies, “He thought he should never stop asking her until she grew tired of his constant request and finally say yes. But he was also terrified that one day she would stop visiting and never come back. He couldn’t bear the thought of losing her once again. He has to try to persuade her”.

His sister asked insistently whether a wolf can convince a dragon. Their mother reminded them that while he was a wolf, he was also a dragon. No one says no to a dragon, it seems.

“Old folks say he completely lost his mind and shut down the castle, buried in his regret and sorrow. They say he did not set foot outside the castle since her death, or since she stopped visiting, depending on the variation of story they choose to tell. Others say she killed him in revenge, burned his body and fed him to her dragons.” 

Angrily, her sister said she will never do that because she loved her just as much as he had loved her. He does not know what to make of it. Did she really kill him? Or did she take him? Thankfully, his sister saved him the trouble and embarrassment, his sister asked.

“And what do you believe, mother”?

They watched their mother, a slight smile dancing on her lips.

“I think he finally left this castle to be with her. She finally forgave him and took him with her”. 

“And where did they go?” His sisters’ eyes were glassy. They really have a knack for sappy stories.

“Somewhere they can love each other in peace, without the clashing kingdoms and wars. Somewhere they can stay for a thousand years and no one will ever find them; where they grew old together, in a house with a red door and lemon trees outside the window. Somewhere Home.”

**Author's Note:**

> If it isn't obvious enough, I am with the mother.  
For months now, I've been living in this bubble where Jon and Dany are somewhat living together in peace, with their daughter named Rhaella. Leave me be.
> 
> This is my first fic so I am sorry if it isn't nearly as good as the works you've read here. This is the first time I actually wrote something for a fandom (since this is the first time I was royally pissed at the final season of a TV show I love.)  
I am still beyond pissed at season 8 so I decided to write this.
> 
> Let me know what you think? :) *hides in a cave*
> 
> Update: you guys! I posted this story without expecting anything. I just wanted it out of my head so I want to thank you all so much for your sweet comments, it really means a lot. *sniffs*  
As I said, this was my first fic ever so your kind words are really appreciated. Thank you. ❤️


End file.
